Best Mom

Well I made it through yesterday without killing my kids. I ended up taking them to the library and the summer movie. (We saw Charlie and the Chocolate Factory) But I am telling you, by the end of the day I wanted to hang the children by their toes. I think I was just extra sensitive. They weren't being especially naughty or irritating. It was the usual level of grating offensiveness. But I just felt like I could not handle another minute of it. So I did what any horrible mother might do in the same circumstances. I took them somewhere and plopped them in front of a giant screen. They did not like the movie because they found it a little weird, but they were quiet for almost 2 hours and I enjoyed it too. I escaped into the world of Johnny Depp. It would have been nice to have a little romance mixed in the story for my own benefit, but all of the candy and chocolate were a great substitute. I could live my fantasies of eating all the candy and chocolate I want without the insult of adding those evil forces to my hips, thighs, and chins. When we got home we had to go to a soccer game. (They won this time!!!) And then we came home and ate dinner and put the kiddies to bed. It was bath night, but I just couldn't do it. I could not fight with the water all over the floor and the screaming when trying to rinse out shampoo and the screaming when trying to brush through wet hair. Plus, there weren't any clean pajama's anyway. The laundry was still in the dryer. I attempted to be a mom yesterday, but I ended up being a naughty teenage babysitter who does everything the mom asks her not to do. The kids ended up with no vegetable for dinner, only some spaghetti with Prego. And if they asked for treats all day my wrote reply was, "I don't care." To which Hilton would delightfully reply, "that means YES!" Today I shall be a better mom. I will make sure they get plenty of fruits (or at least fruit snacks) and vegetables (or at least make sure some of the fruit snacks are green.) I will not yell at my children (at least not loud enough for the neighbors to hear.) I will play games with them (or at least get the games down from the top shelf for them.) and I will make sure they are clean (or at least presentable.) I already feel like a better mom today. It is almost 8:30 and I have not put one of them in their room yet! I am the BEST mom in the WORLD!!!