Warriors

I keep saying I am going to send my daughter to the gypsies, and I am pretty sure that if I had their phone number, I really would...  Caroline has become a beast in her 12th year.  She will be 12 in October and will be entering Young Women and I just keep thinking, it will get better.  She will start being a polite, obedient daughter.  She will not whine and cry when I ask her to do something.  She will not pop off with some smart remark when I do something that does not please her.  She will conform to my way of thinking...  I am not thinking that I am delusional.

Saturday there was a Relief Society meeting with Sister Julie B. Beck at the I-Center.  It was for South Eastern Idaho.  I think 70 Stakes were invited.  I had to usher for it...  so I went.  There were almost 10,000 in attendance!  Almost all women!  It was a wonderful meeting and I feel like I got a lot out of what she had to say.  One thing struck me, well, a lot more than one thing, in fact...  but this one thing pertains to this particular post...  she said that Heavenly Father is not sending down the polite, obedient, submissive spirits to live in these times.  The spirits He is sending to earth have got to be warriors.  They have to be strong, independent thinkers.  They have to be the ones who are going to fight!  So when we ask why our children are so strong-willed and disobedient and obstinate, this is why.  I should be grateful for my difficult children.  She did say that we are the ones that have to teach them, to train them.  We are basically the boot camp drill sargents in a manner of speaking.  We need to whip them into shape.  Not in the same way they do at boot camp, but with love, compassion and with the Spirit as our guide.  But, I tell you what, it is getting harder and harder every day. 

I have good kids.  They are very well-behaved and polite in public.  To others, they would never dream of being the brats that they are at home.  But that really doesn't help me here...  I want my home to be a heaven on earth as the song goes, and it feels more like a war zone.   But listening to Sister Beck helped me to feel like maybe I am not alone.  Not everyone has this all figured out.  I just need to hang in there and make sure I am giving my children the tools they need to live righteous lives in unrighteous times.  The Lord is not apologizing for the times we are living in.  The greatest prophesies are coming to pass right now, around us.  He knew and knows everything that is happening and will happen...  and He is not telling us how sorry He is, because it has to happen.  But he needs his warriors on this earth for the big battle.  And my role is to teach His warriors.  That is a daunting task.  Our children need to be armed with an arsenal!  They have to have the truth in them before it can come out of them.  Who is the one to put it there?  Mom.  That is me. 

As the Mommy, I create the climate in my home where the Spirit can dwell.  That is terribly frightening to me.  I wish I were a better mom, a better person, a better member of the church.  I feel ill-prepared for this job.  I am trying to arm my children with no weapons myself and that scares me to death. 

But I will press forward and do my best.  If I yell...  (which I do, a lot,) I will have to try to remember that the Spirit speaks with a still-small voice.  And when I cry because I feel like I can't do it anymore, I just have to hang in there and remember I am not alone.  There are lots of us out there. 

So, here's to you mom's... get your warriors ready...  it's time for boot camp.